Thursday, March 18, 2010
I don’t really understand how this little brain works. How it stimulants my ego and electrified it with questions, loads of question about my position, about where am at, about what should I do later, about who is he, about who is she, what they are for me, about what I should do, what they possibly feel when they are together.
I do run. A lot. And I never want to finish anything. Time will heal and I’ll do just fine. Will they? Will those tiny shreds of unfinished conversation be fine without me? I’m sure they will. Although they haunt also but leaving is the best idea of all. It is the last, very last, option too, which sounds stupid. I am stupid, creating that stupid way to rid of stupid relationship, in stupid situation.
I still believe we’ll do just fine without each other, without explanation, without utter bullshit and rows of shitty chains of events. I don’t talk, I told you many times. I write. But as I know mouth is created to talk, I should force myself to talk. I should. I should.