Sunday, February 15, 2015

Living

It is easy to be just exist. To be present in all situations I was asked to . To just sat back and listened carefully to lecture I didn't need.
But to live is different case. It's whole different level. Life is constant learning process without undo or backspace. Life means choosing your own story without being able to reopened previous page where you were asked which way you'd choose.
We live our lives differently. Noted.

Thursday, February 12, 2015

Good Friends

Bizzare.
I guess. When someone far away from you can soothe your pain better than someone who is close to you. Who have seen your evil and angel sides or something in between that is not even in dictionary.

I am a person who don't believe in good friends. I have none close to me ever. Few best are left behind since they have business to do, students to teach, kids to raise, family to be taken care of. Or maybe I who have left them behind. Leaving question mark am I the only one who is comfortable of being goodfriend-less?

I marry someone I love. I just can't believe how enought he is for me for at least these 1 year something of our marriage. How enough he is to be not-too-good listener but still enough for me. How enough he is to fulfill all my best friends can do although I think I never have one. How enough he is to bear, to admit my pain become his.

Am I too poetic?
The tragedy is, I always think family is more than enough but still we need friends. But still I rarely chat with ones.

Monday, February 9, 2015

Reply

To be brutally honest, I don't pay attention to replies of people of whose talks I don't wanna bother about. Mean? Hahha. Yea.
Am laughing while typing this but, life is constant heart ache, monotonous, repetitive, deep learning of understanding. That what I think makes our relationship and bond are getting stronger, never loosen.

Gw bersyukur udah menikah dan punya anak. Jadi ibadahnya pas gitu. Ga keluyuran sana sini lagi (based on my opinion sih, hahha).

Bogor hujan. Tidur diapit suami dan anak bikin mellow. Bersyukur masih bisa tidur nyenyak. Lihat berita, banyak banget titik banjir di Jakarta.

Setiap orang dikasi ujiannya sendiri, dikasi jalan masing-masing untuk lebih dewasa sama Allah. Semoga kita terus bisa bersyukur dan berhasil ngelewatin ujian dari Allah ya.. walopun pasti ada ujian lain menanti setelah lulus ujian yang sekarang. Amiin.

Am getting better. Tifa is getting better, too. Alhamdulillah. Tidur yuk ah.. 23:54 di jam gw. Note for today : Monday is NOT always rough and slippery. Heheh.

Sunday, February 8, 2015

Sakit

Plis jangan lanjutin jadi lagu..atau nyanyi 'sakau'. Lagi hits banget tu catita ama jojonk yaa.
Ini sakit beneran. Gw sakit. Teefa sakit. Sedih deh. Beneran.
Huuu..
Kalo masi sendiri, sakit doesn't matter at all. The term 'ill' malah kadang bikin seneng karena pacar melakukan segalanya dari bikin teh manis, makan sore, semuanya deh.

Tapi kalo sekarang gw sakit malah sedih.
Ga bisa full jaga Teefa. Dan parahnya dia ketularan gwwwww.

:'(
Sedih ih.. sayang cepet sembuh yaa. Besok kita ke dokter ya, nak.
Alhamdulillah suami kooperatif sekali. Mandiin, beberes rumah, beliin makanan, dan ga minta macem-macem. Makasi ya sayang, udah ngertiin keadaan aku yang tadinya kerja dan sekarang jadi IRT yang belum mahir mahir amat ngapa-ngapain.

Buat suami, makasi ya a. Pokonya makasi deh. Udah berjuang buat keluarga kecil kita. Ngertiin aku yg keukeuh. Ngertiin mertua kamu yang keras (walopun kita tau kenapa). I love you to the moon and back. Dari marahnya aku, cemberutnya aku, atau kalopun aku lagi sebel sama kamu, aku terus doain kamu, kita, sama anak kita.
Makasi ya sayang..

By the time I'm writing this, he is cleaning the bathroom. Am off to iron the pile of clothes.
Love ya, Kicks!

Thursday, February 5, 2015

Things

02:32
AM.
Kanan suami tidur. Kiri anak tidur.
Napas sesek. Pilek. Ga bisa tidur.

Kadang ga tau kenapa malah ngetik. Bukan coba tidur. Malah kepikiran jalan-jalan. Buy stuffs : clothes, bags, make up..

Tapi kayanya tujuan hidup bukan itu deh. Bukan jalan2, bukan shopping. Ya sih, walopun kadang emang kalo beli sesuatu atau kalau udah jalan rasanya refreshed, tapi itu udah lama..

Beberapa minggu lalu berkali-kali ke mall. Muter-muter aja. Berharap bisa beli sesuatu. Taunya nggak. Ga ada aja pengen beli ini itu.

Sampe pernah males makan. Ga napsu. Ehh malah sakit. Iya sih emang menyusui nguras lemak banget. Hahhha. Udah turun 20kg.. 5kg nya masi bandel aja nih hiks.

Dan sekarang. Sakit bukannya istirahat malah kepikiran cucian, tas berdus dus numpuk kudu dikirim, besok Teefa gimana kalo gw sakit.

Harusnya tiduuurrr.. kalo tadi tidur dan bangun jam segini kan bisa tahajjud. Tapi itu ya..susah banget kalo udah tidur, terus maksain bangun buat tahajjud.

Life has stages. I don't know where I am at right now. Harus bisa bereain satu-satu kerjaan yang belum beres.
Besok nyuci,setrika,ngepel, beresin tas, jalan ke indomaret ambil uang, packing sepatu preloved, masak, makan, nyemil.

Lateefa?
Di hati mama xP
Sayang, besok makan nasi kaldu wortel yaa :*